he is a sucker for odours.
he wants to know everyone of her odours.
from her cologne to her hair food.
from her breathe to her shoe smell.
yes, a moment ago he smelled her shoe. lol.
she has had it for 2 years and it still looks and smells new.
it has a minor odour of wood.
a new odour has been added to his odour memory.
-yah, i know. i said odour a lot. odour odour odour. –
she smiles so well.
her bliss feel is contagious.
he sees her crossing the road.
the walk, the sway, the unique dimples on the sides of her lips as she smiles and looks away.
he does not long to see her, but when he does, he knows that that's what he longed for.
he glances at her with every moment he gets.
one year away. he can wait.
his patience will not betray him.
one year away – xix
he sees her after 10 days
he wants to hug her, squeeze her, pick her up and kiss her.
her braces are off.
her hair is shorter.
she is beautiful. more beautiful.
he has been silent about her for sometime
hoping she will get off his mind.
no, she is still on his mind.
he wants to run away with her right now
but he can't. not that he cannot.
he must not.
that's the rule.
when i see a mother and her little son
i think of mom and i.
how she always held my hand when we walked together.
crossing the road. walking to church. me running ahead of her.
her rebuking me with the most beautiful still voice.
a voice that makes my heart pump gallons.
she raised my sister an i like a princess and a prince.
no, we did not get everything we wanted,
we sure got everything we needed.
we still do.
she gave us the greatest gift on the face of the earth.
love. she still giving it.
riding a combi with a fired man.
"we regret to inform you that your contract will be terminated on 20th july 2017 because you failed to comply to the terms of this contract. so we give you a 1 month notice…"
i pip into his paper.
he has opened it to read it one more time.
the look on his face.
he tries to act 'cool'
but i can sense his hurt.
he is devastated.
i write this looking at him.
his facial muscles are sagging.
his eyes look sore.
he actually looks high.
maybe he is.
maybe he is getting fired for making out with mary jane during working hours.
i mean, a night security guard's life needs some hype sometimes.
oh well, i hope he complies to the rules on his next job.
her presence calms him down.
even from a distance.
just her existence.
the year is moving slow.
the days are dragging.
will they make it to the finish line?
all these people in a combi, and none of them thought of taking the front sit.
well, i guess HE was saving it for the lady in white.
we all look at her to see how she is gonna get it.
one man tries helping her,
but she is ait.
she has been in this business for a while now.
no pity for her, please.
helping her would probably mean that she can't do anything for herself.
i wonder how it feels to lose a perfect walk.
it gives me great joy to see them play and bond. all the tension i always see in class is gone and they just have a great time. i giggled with contentment when i saw them celebrate after a save. the smallest of them all as a goalkeeper. he is absolutely brilliant. he makes impossible saves. the way they celebrate after a goal. i could see the joy in their eyes. the disappointment in the opponents’ faces, and the mixed filling from the cheerleaders, the females in the class. i can watch this the whole day. they make me laugh as they try dribble and imitate their favorite football plays, or at least that’s what i think they are doing. my life as a teach is starting to take a different route. a more pleasant route. these kids are therapy to my broken heart, my broken soul, my longing mind. they bring out of me the kind of joy that is going to echo through the days of my life in this school. i am considering staying here till my contract elapses. i mean, two and a half years is not bad considering what i am gaining.
maybe i can put further studies on hold till i am done with my purpose here. i am content.
he has seen this one before. he calls. she answers. they chat. it’s nice. they set an appointment. she agrees to come. they talk the whole day on the appointment day. she promises to come. she makes him cook for her. he does. she calls to say she is working late but she will come. he waits eagerly. the time hits 8pm. he calls to check if she is ok. she does not pick up the phone. he sends texts. she is still silent. he calls again and again. she does not pick up the phone. he gets hurt. he keeps calling the following morning. she is still not picking up. he gets worried. she goes silent for over a month or two after her conscience is settles. he reaches out again. same story repeats itself.
he laughs cause he has written about it before. he vowed never to go back to her again.
but he loves her. everything becomes a déjà-vu to him only at the end.
this time he did not cook or wait for her at home. no. he left home to do his will and waited for her call.
she never called.
she says she can’t talk to people after she has disappointed them. yet, that is the best time to talk to people and apologize.
silence in disappointments has never been a treatment.
it is rather a sword cutting deep into the wounds of my broken heart.